The game takes place in a construction yard for reasons I couldn’t begin to fathom. Most skating games take place in, well, skate parks. Some take place on city streets. Not many are set on building sites for the simple reason that it would be retarded to skate in a bloody building site. Regardless, you skate one, trying not to fall over (and failing, repeatedly) while collecting stars. The stars, it seems can only be gathered if you touch them with your skateboard; I went right through plenty in the course of playing with no result. That’s really all there is to it. Unlike other games of this type, Pro Skate doesn’t feature any tricks. You can hold onto the board by pressing the “C” key if you want to flip in the air, but why bother? You’ll probably just land on your head and you get more points for just finishing the level quickly.

I found that the best strategy was just to move slowly across the screen, not attempting to do anything other than reach the end. It got me to the later levels but it was, naturally, about as exciting as Sundays with your grandmother.

Lacking good gameplay, good controls and good graphics, as well as any sounds at all (which I don’t normally comment on, but which in this case just bugged me) Pro Skate is an ironic title, if ever I heard one. There’s no real skating, and none of it happens in a professional environment. Every level is the same bland grey with a generic city silhouette in the background. There’s no enjoyment to be gleamed from winning, and losing is far too easy. Considering there are already some really great skating sims out there, Pro Skate had to deliver far more than a slapdash balancing game to garner anything other than apathy.

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