Posted by Conor Duffy on Feb 24th, 2010
Well, here we are once again, and observant readers will know that this week I look at a game that sucks. As per usual, I spent my evening frantically searching for something sufficiently awful to rip into. But on my journey into the heart of mediocrity I found something far more intriguing – the second most depressing game I’ve ever played.
The most depressing game (if you can call it that) was developed by Nifflas and had you take on the role of an executioner killing a man by firing squad. If you shot the man, every time the game loaded you would be presented with his corpse, still blindfolded and tied to a post. The game’s message was that all actions had long-lasting consequences and made me examine the fragility and importance of life in a new way. It also left me utterly despondent.
So congratulations to Evan Miller and Armor Games; with Immortall you almost made me feel just as much despair.
Immortall starts off with a pretty simple premise: small alien crash lands on Earth and meets a little girl. The little girl introduces the alien to her big brother who’s too cool for school, but not too cool for apple picking. They kind of hang out and walk to their house, where the alien meets the children’s parents.
The parents kind of freak out at first, but they’re OK after a minute. So everyone is chillaxing and you all decide to just go for a walk. So far, so good; the alien has ingratiated himself to a bunch of cool humans and is getting a taste for Earth and all it has to offer. That’s about the time our group walk into a war zone and start getting shot at.
Woah, woah! What the hell just happened!? Did this family not notice the fucking war happening right next to their house? How is that possible? And why are all the soldiers so desperate to kill them? Did the alien befriend the Von Trapp family? Jesus!
The decimation of the Von Trapps continues on Page 2.
Related posts:
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: LOLCat Escape
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Platform Robot 2
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Balloon In A Wasteland
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Smash Boxing
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Flash Runner
Pages: 1 2
Related posts:
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: LOLCat Escape
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Platform Robot 2
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Balloon In A Wasteland
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Smash Boxing
- Big Mean Flash Gamer: Flash Runner
Comments are currently closed.
My response to this “game” is best summed up in meme form:
“WHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN”
The most depressing Flash game I’ve ever played might be Don’t Look Back, one of those “retro-look” platformers that’s based on the legend of Orpheus and Eurydice – you’re on a quest to retrieve your deceased lover’s spirit from Hell. However, even if you succeed in doing it, you get a time-loop bummer of an ending that suggests that it was all in vain, since you’re both dead. Nothing like ending an ultra-tough platformer with a sense of futility and despair like that…
That was, of course, before ImmorTall.
I’ve seen that game, but haven’t played it. I don’t think I want to now.
Before Immortall, the most recent depressing game I played was The Company of Myself. It’s a game so good I chose it for my Christmas review, but it doesn’t change the fact that what starts off as a curious platformer that has you using copies of yourself to solve puzzles turns out to be the fevered hallucinations of a mental patient who killed his wife and buried her in the garden.
I’m commenting on this again to point out something not mentioned in the review: There is evidently an alternate ending to the game, one in which the alien actually lives. To get it, you must wait until the war breaks out and you must have been shot at least once. If you turn around and head back the way you came, all the way back to the starting point, you can get back in your spaceship and leave.
Of course, if you do that you pretty much abandon the human family to their fates, so it’s still a downer no matter what you do. Still, at least it’s something different you can do with this game…
Wow – that actually feels like even more of a downer ending, because not only does everyone die, you the alien look like a jerk.